Your Funny, Humorous or Incredible Military Stories

[evangilder]

Thats a great one, Charles!

[pbfoot]

Back in the day I was posted to a place thats media was 1 am radio station it started off every morning at 0600 with the mornings hymn, as the morning shift change was occuring one of the NCO's said F### the hymn and cut the power cord with a pair of side cutters . One bright officer seen this and decided to duplicate the feat the next morning on the repaired cord but he wasn't paying attention (typical officer) and cut the power cord with unisulated scissors to everyones amusement

[Njaco]

So it was a bright idea!

[A4K]

They should teach more officers that trick!!!

[Matt308]

That was freakin' hilarious Charles!!!

And thanks for all the great posts guys.

[ccheese]

Originally Posted by Matt308

That was freakin' hilarious Charles!!!

Glad you like that one, Matt. I'd have given a months pay
to have been on that PBM.

Charles

[Matt308]

Well I don't know about that. Pretty dangerous stunt actually, 'imposing vertigo on some hapless pilot'.

[pbfoot]

not mine but humourous
"then there was the Bristol Freighter an aircraft so homely and awkward looking it could only have built in Britain. a huge , fixed undercarriage hung below this sawed off duckling. the wing resembled a plank torn off a barn and the entire apparition moved through the air at a sedate 150mph . One control tower operator amazed on first spying one of these aircraft attempting to land on his airfield called the pilot and asked "what type of aircraft is that?"
"A Bristol Freighter" the pilot replied
To which the controller replied " Did you make it yourself?"

[mkloby]

Originally Posted by pbfoot

One bright officer seen this and decided to duplicate the feat the next morning on the repaired cord but he wasn't paying attention (typical officer) and cut the power cord with unisulated scissors to everyones amusement

Hey now!!!

Originally Posted by pbfoot

not mine but humourous
"then there was the Bristol Freighter an aircraft so homely and awkward looking it could only have built in Britain. a huge , fixed undercarriage hung below this sawed off duckling. the wing resembled a plank torn off a barn and the entire apparition moved through the air at a sedate 150mph . One control tower operator amazed on first spying one of these aircraft attempting to land on his airfield called the pilot and asked "what type of aircraft is that?"
"A Bristol Freighter" the pilot replied
To which the controller replied " Did you make it yourself?"

That is pretty funny!

[Captain Dunsel]

The place: Air Force Basic Training, Lackland AFB, TX.
The date: Early MAR75

As Airman Basics (ABs), we were routinely harassed with inspections of all types. One day, our Training Instructor (TI) and a bunch of his buddies ran another harassment “exercise”. A bunch of screaming TI’s went through our lockers, pulling inspection tags out of the pockets of uniforms hanging in our lockers. They pushed the tags into our faces and reamed us for failing to them from our uniforms (Funny, but I knew I’d cleaned out my uniform pants…besides, each uniform type had a unique tag, and the TI had pulled FATIGUE tags from my tans...).

Anyway, after yelling at us for a while, the TI’s “decided’ to teach us a lesson by making us put all of our carefully folded uniforms, towels, and such into our duffle bags and double-time them downstairs to the parade area under our barracks. Once there, we had to drop our bags and stand at attention.

That’s when we all heard and funny hissing/roaring noise….and it was coming from one not-very-sharp ABs duffle bag. A TI carefully opened the bag, looked in, and started making some very strange faces. He obviously wanted to laugh, but he was trying very, very hard to keep up the hard-a$$ persona. Shoulders shaking, he finally closed the duffle bag and walked away, shaking his head.

Some of you may remember the shaving cream cans that had a nozzle you pushed sideways to dispense the cream….Yup, our AB had tossed his shaving cream can into the bag, without the cap. It took him quite a while to clean up the mess…

CD

[Matt308]

[machine shop tom]

My dad was a 40mm twin mount AA gunner on the Fanshaw Bay, CVE-70. During the Battle Off Samar, he and another gunner were sitting back to back, waiting to get sunk. They both lifted their heads back at the same time and "clink" went their helmets. They both about shat themselves........

tom

[Captain Dunsel]

Late July, 1975
Chanute AFB, IL, Weather Observer Training School
Building 341

I had to weigh my bags as I had graduated and was about to leave for my first duty assignment. The problem was, I couldn’t remember which building’s basement the scale was in. It was late in the evening when I started looking for the scale.

I went to the first building, walked into the darkened basement, and got yelled at by an angry voice when I reached for the light switch. Taking a quick look, I saw a couple in a tight embrace on the floor of the big room, with some articles of clothes scattered about. I apologized and backed out of the room, but not before I got a good look at the pair.

I knew both of them; the female was rather well known as being available to just about anyone who was interested. They guy was married, and his (very) pregnant wife lived just off base. Hmm, time for some fun.

I knew a friend who had a bunch of bottle rockets in his trunk, so I got him and he fetched a pair of rockets. Along the way, I grabbed a pizza box from a convenient trash can. We made a simple ramp out of the box and put the pair of bottle rockets on it. I took a cigarette, punched a hole in it the side of it, and put the fuses from the bottle rockets into the fuse. I then lit the cigarette and we quickly crept down the darkened stairs.

As we crawled into the room, we could see the couple was now fully naked and, umm, "busy". I set the rocket launcher on the floor and aimed it in their direction, then my buddy and I crawled back out of the room and tip-toed up the stairs.

As we reached the top of the stairs, we heard the rockets WHOOSH almost simultaneously, followed by two quick BANGs and a some very loud screams.

We then trotted out of the stairwell, only to run right into a trio of student leaders. We said we really didn’t know what the explosions were about, but we did know there were two trainees in the basement, apparently exhibiting severe PDAs (Public Displays of Affection). The student leaders went to the basement, and we heard a LOT of laughter --- and cursing.

We later learned the couple was escorted out of the basement; she was escorted to her floor and he was escorted off base. Both wanted to know who’d been shooting at them…

I later went back down and looked around the room. From where the rocket carcasses landed, it looked like they’d both gone off only a few feet from the guy’s butt…

Post-script: The guy and I both went off on our assignments. As far as I know, he never learned who’d interrupted his fun. I don’t know if his wife ever found about his indiscretion. The female was caught in a parked car with another female airman, and they both were discharged.

CD

[Matt308]

Any pics of the female?

[Captain Dunsel]

Sorry, no camera with me back then. Besides, she wasn't very attractive, IIRC.

CD