 | Quokes/Jotes... Continued! 2!| OFF-Topic / Misc. Discuss Quokes/Jotes... Continued! 2! in the Current forums; ... |
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03-24-2007, 05:21 PM
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#1276 | | World Traveler
Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Royal Deeside/St Andrews, Scotland, UK
Posts: 11,751
Country:  |
__________________  "Success is not Final, Failure is not Fatal, it is the Courage to Continue that Counts"
Sir Winston Churchill
"To him the People of the World Largely owe the Freedom and Liberties they Enjoy Today"
Enscription on Hugh Dowding's (AOC Fighter Command 1936-40) statue in London
Moderator WW2 Talk: A WW2 Discussion Forum
My Photo Collections on Flickr
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03-25-2007, 12:45 AM
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#1277 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country:  | Perhaps just my mood, but I found the Blair parody just disturbing. Not the Bush parody? Nope. Just sad that Blair is being victimized. Oh well.
__________________ 
"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
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03-25-2007, 07:02 AM
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#1278 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Evesham, UK
Posts: 180
Country: | Oh you have no idea just how much blair is victimised over here. He may look kinda nice on the outside but really, he deserves a helluva lot of it.
E.G.
__________________  "We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English."
-Sir Winston Churchill
Last edited by Ajax : 03-25-2007 at 09:25 AM.
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03-25-2007, 03:15 PM
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#1279 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country: | Hmm. Sounds like our House of Representatives. "We'll fund the warrior, but only if I can include my state pork spending to study why infants are small in stature."
__________________
"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
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03-25-2007, 07:50 PM
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#1280 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Evesham, UK
Posts: 180
Country: | YouTube
sorry if you find it racist. It's about nazis, not germans...
__________________ "We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English."
-Sir Winston Churchill | |
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03-25-2007, 11:00 PM
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#1281 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: UK
Posts: 3,573
Country:  | Two statues one male one female sat facing each other in a city park. until one day an angel came down from heaven. as a reward for being exemplary statues she was going to bring them to life for 30 mins and they could do what ever they wanted.with a wave of her wand they came to life looked at each other then headed for the nearest hedge. after a lot of giggling and laughter and rustling they came back looking rather flushed. the angel said that was quick you,ve still got 15 mins left.the male statue looked at the female and said right this time you hold the pigeon down and i,ll s**t on its head. | |
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03-26-2007, 04:35 AM
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#1282 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Kiwi Land
Posts: 849
Country:  | Whats the difference between a trapeeze artist and a prostitute.
One of them has a cunning stunt.
__________________
4 out of 5 voices in my head say I am normal. Majority rules.
You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. | |
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03-26-2007, 05:06 PM
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#1283 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Cracow
Posts: 3,388
Country:  | The last laugh!
Several years ago, after having Japanese executives from the automotive industry tour a Ford Plant, they held a press conference in which one of the Japanese execs claimed that the American workers were slow and lazy.
Not long after, a friend sent me a picture of a bumper sticker on a truck at the Ford plant.
It read - "We may be slow and lazy, but we build a damn good bomb!"
__________________ 
"A good fighter pilot, like a good boxer, should have a knockout punch..... You will find one attack you prefer to all others. Work on it till you can do it to perfection... then use it whenever possible." - Captain Reade Tilley, USAAF 7 Victories, WW-II - | |
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03-26-2007, 05:49 PM
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#1284 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Evesham, UK
Posts: 180
Country: | A "Merkin" (pronounced "Mur-Kin" is a form of pubic wig.
I don't know if you've noticed, but the Merkin appears many times in President Bush's speeches;
"My fellow Merkins" he says, "I must state that the Iraqis should not erupt into civil war. and if they do, I promise I will protect the Merkins and the Merkin way of life. As a Merkin myself, I feel sorry for those Merkins who find themselves on the frontlines, exposed. So let us give thanks to those Merkins, thay are heroes to me.
Thankyou.
__________________ "We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English."
-Sir Winston Churchill
Last edited by Ajax : 03-26-2007 at 06:10 PM.
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03-27-2007, 10:50 PM
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#1285 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country: | >> >A man escapes from prison, where he has been for 15 years. He breaks
>> >into a house to look for money and guns, and finds a young couple in
>> >bed.
>> >
>> >He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the
>> >girl to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up
>> >and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his
>
>> >wife: "Listen, this guy is an escaped convict, look at his clothes!
>He
>> >probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years.
>I
>> >saw how he kissed your neck.
>> >If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells
>you.
>> >Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably
>> >very dangerous If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I
>love
>> you."
>> >
>> >His wife responds, "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in
>my
>> >ear.
>> >He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had
>> >any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I
>> >love you too!"
__________________
"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
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03-31-2007, 01:54 PM
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#1286 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Cracow
Posts: 3,388
Country: | Training the blonde
An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened to her. She answered the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn't get out of her room.
"You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied, "There are only three doors in here, "she cried," one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
__________________
"A good fighter pilot, like a good boxer, should have a knockout punch..... You will find one attack you prefer to all others. Work on it till you can do it to perfection... then use it whenever possible." - Captain Reade Tilley, USAAF 7 Victories, WW-II - | |
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03-31-2007, 04:07 PM
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#1287 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country: |  Didn't see that one coming.
__________________
"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
| | |
03-31-2007, 06:52 PM
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#1288 | | World Traveler
Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Royal Deeside/St Andrews, Scotland, UK
Posts: 11,751
Country: | Me neither
__________________ "Success is not Final, Failure is not Fatal, it is the Courage to Continue that Counts"
Sir Winston Churchill
"To him the People of the World Largely owe the Freedom and Liberties they Enjoy Today"
Enscription on Hugh Dowding's (AOC Fighter Command 1936-40) statue in London
Moderator WW2 Talk: A WW2 Discussion Forum
My Photo Collections on Flickr
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03-31-2007, 07:01 PM
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#1289 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Evesham, UK
Posts: 180
Country: | Now i'm a modern, hetrosexual man. I can go out and buy a packet of tampons and not be embarassed.
But apparently, they're not a "proper present" | |
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04-02-2007, 04:15 PM
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#1290 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country: | Haven't seen Lanc in a while. Oh well. One of his ewes sent me a picture of his bedroom. I was wondering what you guys make of this...
__________________
"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
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