An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Monte Casino went to the local church for confession.
When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said, 'Father ..
during World War II, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide
her from the enemy. So I hid her in my attic.'
The priest replied, 'That was a wonderful thing you did, my son! And you have no need to confess that.'
'It's worse than that, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favors every day and twice on weekends.'
The priest said, 'By doing that, you were both in great danger. However, two people under those circumstances can be very tempted to act that way. But if you are truly
sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven.'
'Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. ...But I do have one more
question.'
'And what is that?' asked the priest.
.....'Should I tell her the war is over?'
__________________ "Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
-Benjamin Franklin
"I haven't Shenaniganed in about six years . . . I've hooliganed, I've no-good nicked, I've ne'er done well, just yesterday I caught myself rabble-Rousing"
__________________
JAN
"I´m going back to the front to relax"
"THE BLACK CATS FLIES TONIGHT"
"Find your enemy and shoot him down - everything else is unimportant!"
"When you're out of F-8's... You're out of fighters!"
"How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours.
The guy left.
A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around at the shop and said: "About 3 hours". The guy left.
A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around the shop and said: "About an hour and half". The guy left.
The barber turned to a friend and said, "Hey, Bill, do me a favour. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn't come back."
A little while later, Bill returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, "So where does that guy go when he leaves?"
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