 | Quokes/Jotes... Continued! Chapter 3| OFF-Topic / Misc. Discuss Quokes/Jotes... Continued! Chapter 3 in the Current forums; When it was raining a young John was gamming hide-and-seek with his brother and sister.Unfortunately all hiding-... |
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04-25-2008, 07:47 AM
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#766 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 5,290
Country:  | 
When it was raining a young John was gamming hide-and-seek with his brother and sister.Unfortunately all hiding-places at his home were well-known to his siblings.One day having no choice he jumped under his Grandma's big skirt.Nobody has found him for long time.An houre later he decided to come out into the open.His sister and brother were very surprised of his idea.Johny looked at them and then at his grandmother and asked:
What is that you have there under the skirt, Grannie?
Being very embarrassed the old woman answered - A pussycat, my dear boy.
Wow .... cried out John.It must be a very old kitty because it stinks a lot.And what is more it has been dead for long time ,its tongue is moved forward from the muzzle.
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04-25-2008, 07:52 AM
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#767 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,528
Country:  | Does Jola know you tell jokes like that, Wojtek ?? | |
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04-25-2008, 07:55 AM
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#768 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 5,290
Country: | She knows all my jokes.
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04-25-2008, 08:02 AM
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#769 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,528
Country: | You did well there then, mate! If I even start to tell one, Ivett just looks at me and says "Wait - is this going to be one of your bad jokes again ..?"   | |
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04-25-2008, 08:07 AM
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#770 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 5,290
Country: | Interesting......Jola doesn't like many of these jokes but she is very patient.Therefore she is my wife. 
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04-25-2008, 08:43 AM
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#771 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,528
Country: | Good on ya, mate! Ivett is very patient with me too, I have to say. I'm very happy to have her! | |
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04-25-2008, 08:59 AM
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#772 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 5,290
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04-25-2008, 09:08 AM
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#773 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,528
Country: | Have a good weekend guys, I'm off home now. | |
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04-25-2008, 09:12 AM
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#774 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Adelaide Sth. Aust.
Posts: 3,173
Country:  | You too mate....almost time for bed here 11.45pm, almost Saturday...
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04-25-2008, 09:16 AM
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#775 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 5,290
Country: | Quote:
Originally Posted by A4K  Have a good weekend guys. | Same to you guys. 
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04-25-2008, 10:43 AM
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#776 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 8,949
Country:  | WORLD WAR III IS COMING
President Bush decides to leave the White House and go out to sit in a local bar. A guy walks in and asks the barman, 'Isn't that Bush sitting at the end of the bar?'
The bartender says, 'Yep, that's him.' So the guy walks over and says, 'Wow, this is a real honor! What are you doing in here?'
Bush says, ' I'm planning WW III.'
The guy says, 'Really? What's going to happen?'
Bush says, 'Well, I'm going to kill 140 million Muslims and one blonde with big tits.
The guy exclaimed, 'A blonde with big tits?
Why kill a blonde with big tits?'
Bush turns to the bartender and says, 'See, I told you, no one gives a **** about the 140 million Muslims'.
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04-25-2008, 11:00 AM
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#777 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Escondido,Ca
Posts: 1,750
Country: | Damn thats funny!!
__________________  Dont shoot him...... It will just make him angry. | 
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04-26-2008, 01:55 AM
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#778 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 697
Country: | An 80-year old Italian man goes to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, "How do you stay in such great physical condition?"
"I'm Italian and I am a golfer," says the old guy. "I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways. Have a glass of vino, and all is well."
"Well," says the doctor, "I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your Dad when he died?"
"Who said my Dad's dead?"
The doctor is amazed "You mean you're 80 years old and your Dad's still alive. How old is he?"
"He's 100 years old," says the old Italian golfer. "In fact he golfed with me this morning, and then we went to the topless beach for a walk, that's why he's still alive ... he's Italian and he's a golfer, too."
"Well," the doctor says, "that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than that. How about your Dad's Dad? How old was he when he died ?"
"Who said my grandpa's dead?"
Stunned, the doctor asks, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living! Incredible, how old is he?"
"He's 118 years old," says the old Italian golfer.
The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, "So, I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?"
"No. Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today."
At this point the doctor is close to losing it. "Getting married!! Why would a 118 year-old guy want to get married?"
"Who said he wanted to?"
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04-26-2008, 08:32 AM
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#779 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Adelaide Sth. Aust.
Posts: 3,173
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04-26-2008, 06:44 PM
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#780 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Kiwi Land
Posts: 848
Country: | One day little Johnny heard a noise and peeked into his parents room to check it out. He opened the door to see his mom bent over the dresser and dad going at it, behind her.
Johnny's dad saw him and gave him a smile and a little wink as Johnny closed the door. After business was finished, Dad went to check on little Johnny.
He opened his bedroom door to find Grandma bent over the dresser and little Johnny going at it behind her.
Dad yelled, "Johnny, what the hell are you doing?!"
Little Johnny replied, "It's not so funny when it's YOUR mom, is it?"
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