 | Quokes/Jokes... Continued! Chapter 3| OFF-Topic / Misc. Discuss Quokes/Jokes... Continued! Chapter 3 in the Current forums; Ouch!!!
Moral of the story: don't piss off grandma!... |
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08-07-2008, 11:04 AM
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#1096 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Hurst, Texas
Posts: 854
Country:  | Ouch!!! 
Moral of the story: don't piss off grandma!
__________________  Pillage, then burn.
Argue not with dragons, for thou art crunchy and go well on toast. | 
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08-09-2008, 09:24 AM
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#1097 | | Siggy Master
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 7,332
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A guy was going by a coach.It was late in the evening and started getting darker.So he used a lash to pinch.Hit the animal ass and the horse looked at him only.The second hit made the animal running faster.Shortly the horse tripped up.The guy used the whip again.The horse looked at him again but nothing done.A few minutes later the next stumble occured and the guy hit the horse using all his strength.The animal turned its head towards him and said:
- If you hit me once again, I'll hit you with my hoof you will lose your teeth.
The guy thunderstruck shouted - I have never seen the talking horse.
A dog running out from the carriage burst out - Me too....
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Last edited by Wurger : 08-09-2008 at 09:28 AM.
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08-09-2008, 09:25 AM
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#1098 | | Siggy Master
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 7,332
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08-09-2008, 02:02 PM
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#1099 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country: | Share one with a friend...
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"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
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08-09-2008, 04:52 PM
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#1100 | | Siggy Master
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 7,332
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08-09-2008, 05:41 PM
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#1101 | | World Traveler
Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Royal Deeside/St Andrews, Scotland, UK
Posts: 11,751
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Guinness has always had the best beer adverts imho...
__________________  "Success is not Final, Failure is not Fatal, it is the Courage to Continue that Counts"
Sir Winston Churchill
"To him the People of the World Largely owe the Freedom and Liberties they Enjoy Today"
Enscription on Hugh Dowding's (AOC Fighter Command 1936-40) statue in London
Moderator WW2 Talk: A WW2 Discussion Forum
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08-09-2008, 05:51 PM
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#1102 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Hurst, Texas
Posts: 854
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__________________ Pillage, then burn.
Argue not with dragons, for thou art crunchy and go well on toast. | |
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08-09-2008, 06:24 PM
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#1103 | | aka Dickcheese
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Washington State
Posts: 11,097
Country: | Was that actually broadcast on TV in Europe? South America? Asia? Or just another great "internets" commercial never to see the light of day.
I can assure you that if that was broadcast on TV here, there would be $million fines, outrage, front page news, and the extreme right gnashing their teeth. I can tell you that if that came on my TV in front of my kids, I would have went ballistic. Funnier than $hit though!!!!
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"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if
they made a difference in the world. But, the [U.S.]
Marines don't have that problem."
-- Ronald Reagan Master of Duplicate Posts | |
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08-10-2008, 06:25 AM
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#1104 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Adelaide Sth. Aust.
Posts: 5,818
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08-10-2008, 10:53 AM
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#1105 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Escondido,Ca
Posts: 2,128
Country: | Thats freakin funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
__________________  Dont shoot him...... It will just make him angry. | |
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08-12-2008, 08:50 PM
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#1106 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Washington DC
Posts: 417
Country: | A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round-trip ticket -- If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabby. He promised to send the driver money from home, he offered him his credit card numbers, his drivers license number, his address, etc. but to no avail.
The cabby said, "If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!" So the businessman was forced to hitch-hike to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight.
One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab ride back to the airport. Well who should he see out there, at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make the guy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan.
The businessman got in the first cab in the line, "How much for a ride to the airport," he asked? "Fifteen bucks," came the reply. "And how much for you to give me a blow job on the way?" "What?! Get the hell out of my cab.
"
The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result. When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked "How much for a ride to the airport?" The cabby replied "fifteen bucks." The businessman said "ok" and off they went. Then, as they drove slowly past the long line of cabs the businessman gave a big smile and thumbs up sign to each driver.
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08-13-2008, 06:56 AM
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#1107 | | World Traveler
Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Royal Deeside/St Andrews, Scotland, UK
Posts: 11,751
Country: | I was walking in a cemetery earlier today and I spotted a bloke hiding behind a gravestone.
I said "Morning"
He replied, "No, just talking a sh*t"
At the age of six I was left an orphan.
What kind of idiot gives an orphan to a six-year-old?
I was asked to run a marathon and I said, "No Chance". Then I was told it was for blind kids and I thought, "Hold on, I could win that".
__________________ "Success is not Final, Failure is not Fatal, it is the Courage to Continue that Counts"
Sir Winston Churchill
"To him the People of the World Largely owe the Freedom and Liberties they Enjoy Today"
Enscription on Hugh Dowding's (AOC Fighter Command 1936-40) statue in London
Moderator WW2 Talk: A WW2 Discussion Forum
My Photo Collections on Flickr
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08-13-2008, 07:58 AM
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#1108 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Hurst, Texas
Posts: 854
Country: | to both of y'all!
__________________ Pillage, then burn.
Argue not with dragons, for thou art crunchy and go well on toast. | |
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08-13-2008, 09:13 AM
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#1109 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Adelaide Sth. Aust.
Posts: 5,818
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08-13-2008, 04:27 PM
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#1110 | | Siggy Master
Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Poland
Posts: 7,332
Country: |
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